Mexico 2017 - In Moving Pictures!

So in my last post I promised you loads of pictures. And what better way to fill this post with pictures than to give you a whole load of moving pictures! 
See below for the Mexico 2017 video that I've put together.  If you've never been before, it'll *hopefully* give you a great insight into the trip. And if you were with us there this year, it'll *hopefully* bring back a whole load of great memories!
We did it. Mexico ReBuild 2017. 4 days. 3 houses. 2-gether. 1 family.

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It's time to shine

Orbit Advert 2016

I was really uncertain whether to write and explore this blog post, let alone publish it. But in that indecisive moment I saw a chewing gum advert. "It's time to shine" boomed out from the TV. So, here I am. *I have no idea what chewing gum has to do with shining a light, though?*

Basically, this post is about my face. Read on. Over the past year, in particular the past 4 months, I've seen a real shift in my thought patterns towards my face. To give some context and explanation I'm going to use some examples. 2015: *wakes up for school*, *sees face in mirror*, *can't bare to look*, *covers it in make up*, *checks out face in mirror*, *thinks 'decent'*, *goes to school* Late 2015: *wakes up for school*, *too tired to look in mirror and put on face*, *goes to school*, *gets asked if I'm ill because I look really pale*, *wishes I put make up on*, *feels sad*

Image source: Google

Early 2016: *wakes up for work*, *sees face in mirror*, *thinks I'm doing the world a favour by covering up those bags under my eyes*, *puts make up on*, *feels like that was a lot of effort*, *envies the majority of the male species for not needing make up*, *goes to work* Late 2016: *wakes up for work*, *doesn't even look in mirror*, *goes to work*, *feels happy* Where did the shift happen?! Somewhere in 2016 I stopped seeing my face for all its flaws and started loving it for what it is. I've got a young face - granted I still get IDed for Strepsils, and they triple check my ID in Spoons, but when I'm 50 and looking 30 I'll be glad of it! At least I don't look old enough to get stopped in the streets to take surveys yet!

The point I'm really trying to get down to is that just a year ago I had so much dislike for my face and now I'm full of love for it! It's a fabulous feeling. From an artistic perspective I still love, love, love plastering my face in make-up and subtly contouring it into a different shape, adding eyeliner and finishing with lipstick until I reach Barbie status.

I absolutely love the 'imagination, life is your creation' line in Barbie's song. Life is all about imagining and creating! And something great about make up is the opportunity to imagine and create art on a real life face - it's art that moves and speaks.
I found very little freedom in forcing myself to wear make up every day, however. It became a time-consuming, mundane, unimaginative experience every morning. I was starting the day conforming to what I thought pleased others: a face with the least amount of flaws possible. But what I really owe the world is a happy face! A face that beams joy and light. At the moment I'm happiest without make up on when I'm out and about. I feel more myself and I'm without the added worry that an itchy eye will cause a smudged wing. I wish I knew the perfect formula for what shifted inside of me. I can only pinpoint it to an amazing God who created this face in the first place and an encouraging friend who speaks truth from her lips. She tells me I'm beautiful until I believe it, helps me to love myself when I'm not feeling it, and shows me I'm great when I don't see it. If you're fortunate enough to have one of these friends, hold on to him or her! Perhaps you are that friend to some people - keep going. If not, I'm telling you right now, yes you the one reading this, that you are beautiful in every single way! You were created by an almighty creator who doesn't make mistakes. You are amazing.  Read it until you believe it. It's true. You're so stunning. On Saturday night last week I went out to a party. With it being a party, we got dressed up, and I decided I was feeling creative. So I did my hair and make up. As soon as the make up was on, I wanted to take it off. I'd made the art, created something new, loved it, and then wanted my real face back. The face I had been wearing for the last 3 months was now hiding!  Upon returning from the party I was so happy to wash my face! It was one of the best feelings.

Saturday night's 'artwork'

Clean face, happy face

Please don't get me wrong here: if you wear make up and it's who you are then that's awesome! We love that about you too! If you don't wear make up and don't enjoy doing make up either and that's who you are, that's great! We love that about you too! See, we're all different. It turns out that wearing make-up isn't for me, in my life, right now. Contrary to what I thought it isn't even part of who I am. I'm much happier now that I've been encouraged to fall in love with my bare face. I think that's about it for now,  Amy xo

A > Z of Thanks

Bonjour! I'm currently writing this whilst sat at my Granny's desk in her house (in France!)
A couple of days ago I picked up my third book of the French getaway holiday: Katie Piper's 'Things Get Better'. It's an awesome book so far; I'm at chapter 4 and loving every page.
A big theme in the book at the moment is positivity in the form of gratitude. I'd thought I'd give an A > Z of Thanks a try and I'd love to share it with you. I've found it so refreshing.
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A) Adventures (however big or small I can find adventure in everything and I'm so thankful for that)

B) Bibz-a-Libz (my cheeky monkey of a sister. She's so stunning and I'm grateful for her ability to laugh my pain away)

C) Church Family(I'm truly grateful for all of the people around me that have become my church family; they help me to keep faith when I'm feeling weak and celebrate with me when I'm feeling strong, thank you guys) 

D) Doctors (having sat with countless doctors throughout my life, from having vaccinations to discussing the ways to best deal with my Joint Hypermobility (JHS/EDS-JHT), I can truly say I'm extremely grateful for all of the advice and support that I have received) 

E) Emma (I'm so thankful for the giggles and surprises and waves that we share)

F) Family (cliché or not, they're my foundation and I'm so thankful to have three people that love me and that I love in my life)

G) Guitar (I'm extremely grateful that I can escape my problems for a while and strum at my guitar; it's awesomely soothing)

H) Hope For Justice (the injustice of human trafficking is forever on my heart. I'm really thankful for all that the guys over at Hope For Justice do, helping this world get one step closer to perfect) 

I) Independence (I'm grateful that I live in a country where woman are allowed to be independent and are treated with respect)

J) Joy (I'm extremely thankful for evenings and days filled with uncontrollable laughter and joy, and for the people that bring such joy into my life)

K) Knowledge (I'm thankful for the knowledge that has been passed onto me by teachers, friends and family throughout my life. I love that I have the opportunity to learn and to be educated)

L) Lampshade (the group chat name for some friends who I am so *jump-up-and-down-with-gratitude* grateful for) 

M) Maize (I'm so thankful for this awesome lady(!); she's a beautiful human being who helps me see beauty in everything) 

N) Nature (nature provides stunning scenery: from still lakes to harsh waterfalls, from sunrise to sunset. I'm so thankful for the beauty that I can find in nature all of the time) 

O) Orange Juice (freshly-squeezed, of course. I'm just so thankful for its amazing taste, haha!) 

P) Parents (I'm grateful for my lovely, gorgeous parents who love me eternally)

Q) Questions (I love asking questions, haha! I'll often be heard saying: 'Random Question.... ?' So I'm grateful for the conversation-openers that questions can become, funny and serious)

R) Rainbows (I absolutely adore rainbows. They're so pretty and they bring a smile to my face every time they pop up in the sky above me. For that I'm thankful) 

S) Skills (I'm thankful for the creative and logical skills that I've been blessed with and for the many that I will learn in the future; they make life all the more interesting and adventurous for me)

T) Tigger and Cinnamon (These are the names of my pretty cats. They give purrfect little cuddles!)

U) Unity (I'm thankful for the variety of friendship groups that I have the pleasure of being involved in, the sense of unity I feel with some individuals and groups is such a blessing)

V) Vision (I have such vision in life, I see things for what they can become and I get to dream BIG, for this I'm ever grateful)

W) Water (I love a good lake, a swimming pool, an ocean, the sea, beautiful cloud formations... without water none of these would exist)

X) Xenial-ity: hospitality, especially to visiting strangers or foreigners. Of the relation between a host and a guest; friendly. (I'm always so thankful for people who are welcoming and hospitable towards me and others) 

Y) Young people (Little minds can teach old souls so much! The innocent honesty of small children is so amazing to witness, whilst the bubbly energy of teenagers is infectious too)

Z) Zeal (People who are passionate about change always fuel my passion to create and see a better world. I'm thankful for these humans)

So many things to be happy for, and there's so much more. I look forward to being able to look back at this list on good and bad days to remind myself of a few happy things.

I'd really encourage you to do the same if you're reading this. It can be as detailed as you like. Get creative with the difficult letters and have a lot of fun!

Smile,

Amy xo

o v e r p o w e r e d

It's been 1 year, 11 months and 11 days since my grandma left for heaven, or 712 days. That makes it 786 days since cancer took my uncle up to heaven too. It's been 280 days since my friends left for uni.  And 277 days have passed since my sister left for college. That's a lot of loss in very little time.  The word 'cancer' doesn't prepare you for the loss that is coming. The many assemblies for your friends who are off to uni don't prepare those who are left behind for the loss they are about to feel. Nothing prepares you for your sister moving out, the person who knows the good and the ugly, the perfect and the rubbish - gone.

Picture source: Google

I can always trust AA Milne to sum things up just right. After experiencing all of that loss I still knew how lucky I was to have such things to be sad about. My eyes were exposed to seeing a little more of life, my mind started to understand... we all lose things. I'm not talking keys and phone (speaking of which, where's my purse...?). I'm talking about those things that trigger an emotion deep inside of you. Those moments that leave you unable to breathe for crying or unable to breathe for punching a wall really hard. But they're not just moments. They're part of your story, part of your journey. A 'bump in the road' a 'change in the direction of the wind'. 

Image source: Google

It physically pains me to know that there are many, many people in this world going through many, many hard things. No one has 'the perfect life' but everyone has an aching desire for one because we were built for greater things, we were built for Heaven. How cliché it would be to tell you that if you cry yourself to sleep every night, you're not alone. That if you haven't cried in months but you're never happy, you're not alone. If you find things easy but feel hurt that people around you are struggling, you're not alone. I'm going to go one step further into the depths of cliché phrases and tell you that it's also really good to talk about those things. Like really, really good!

Image source: Google

A good friend recently high-lighted to me that people find it easy to talk about how they've struggled after it's happened and usually once they're in a different place. This is too true and it explains why I haven't spoken about anything sooner.  I've been suffering recently with lots of things. In the last 2 years I've taken on too much, especially considering I've lost a lot of my support and foundation.  This past week just gone I was house-sitting whilst mum and dad were in France and Becca was at college and it was one of the hardest things I've done and it came at one of the hardest times. The feelings of isolation that I had already been feeling were magnified by living alone. The feelings of fear that I was trying not to let surface were magnified by being alone. The stresses of every day life were magnified by not having someone to talk to. I ended up in a web of difficult thoughts and negativity. A web of over-thinking and a web of over-powering lies that I was convincing myself were true. It was far from fun. Not myself, needing a lot of help. Then I found a group of people who I could start to open up about these things to. Some people that not only did I trust but that I knew wouldn't be burdened by my problems. These people are fighting their own battles and, in most cases, each one of my struggles is shared with at least one of these friends. We've made the decision to keep talking to each other and to keep supporting each other.
The worst thing for me when I'm drowning in struggles and stress is for the people around me to be 'perfectly fine'. I thrive on helping people and if everyone around me is telling me that they're okay, then I find myself pushing them away one by one. No longer feeling as connected to them as I once was. Just feeling a burden and not a support. Feeling useless. I'm not quite out of the woods but I feel so much lighter having been able to share my burden with some brilliant people in recent days. Thank you Jesus for some amazing friendships that have grown out of the ashes.

Image source: Google

There's some food for thought and if you're struggling then please, please talk to someone that will listen and support you!
I'd like to leave you with this:
God doesn't put us through hard times; it's the evil in the world that makes tough times inevitable. But God does use all of the rubbish we experience and turn it positively, over-poweringly for our good <3
Lots of love,
Amy xo